Dad-in-law anxiety

fosteronfilm‘s mom called yesterday. His dad’s in the hospital again. It’s not good. He simply can’t get enough oxygen into his system between his lung and heart problems, and there’s nothing they can do for him. It sounds like they’re just trying to make him as comfortable as they can, hooking him up to oxygen, and hoping that he rallies again.

Matthew thinks that we might be making a trip up to Illinois soon.

I’m filled with dread every time I hear the phone ring. I’ve never lost someone really close to me before, someone I love, a parent or dear friend. And my dad-in-law is all of those things to me. I started having a meltdown last night. I’m so not going to be of any use to Matthew. He’s going to have to end up comforting me instead of the other way around.

I’m terrified.


Writing Stuff

New Words:
850 on “A Thread of Silk” and I’m at zero draft. I’ve emailed the editor this story was originally slated for to see if he’ll still consider my submission even though it exceeds the 10K max in his GLs.

Zokutou word meterZokutou word meter
11,036 / 10,000

Club 100 For Writers


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54 Responses to Dad-in-law anxiety

  1. jaylake says:

    Good luck. If your father-in-law can’t regain health, I hope he’s at least peaceful and comfortable.

      • jaylake says:

        I completely understand your anxiety, by the way. I’m 41, and still have all my parents, siblings, close friends, (ex)spouse, child, and so forth. Somehow I’ve been lucky enough to get this far without confronting what you and have to deal with now.

        • Eugie Foster says:

          has a large extended family and has been to a lot of funerals–the only two I’ve been to have been from his side, one a relative I think I met once, and the other his grandmother–and he’s also experienced the death of his first wife.

          He’s holding up much better than I am. I can’t imagine how he does it. I can’t imagine how anyone does.

  2. winters_edge says:

    Oh, Eugie, I am so sorry. I’ll be thinking of you guys.



  3. jackzodiac says:

    I sort of understand what you are going through… right now everytime I hear the phone ring, I think it is amy calling to tell me her dad died…


    • Eugie Foster says:

      It’s awful. I’m perpetually on the verge of tears, and my heart lurches every time the phone rings. I hate telemarketers.

      • jackzodiac says:

        you and me both… because I am just waiting to hear amy broken down in tears everytime that phone rings and the machine picks up… and I am on the edge of my seat but in that bad way… but my heart goes out to you and your husband… though I can’t wait to see the two of you in april…


  4. ::HUGS::

    I’m so sorry. It’s so hard to lose someone you’re close to.

    If he can’t recover, I hope, at least, that he doesn’t suffer.

    • Eugie Foster says:

      Thank you, sweetie. *hugs* His quality of life has been going down for a while, but there are still good days, and he keeps rallying. I want so badly for him to pull of this.

  5. whirl_twirl says:


    I can’t imagine what it’s like to possibly lose a parent. I was in freak-out-anxiety mode when my mom had her heart surgery, but that was knowing she was in otherwise excellent health.

    Sending you and Matthew and his dad good thoughts for healing and comfort.

  6. aimeempayne says:

    So sorry to hear about your father-in-law’s health. I hope he rallies.

  7. aliettedb says:

    *big hug* I’m so sorry for you. It’s not something I’ve had to live through (none of my relatives have died, or if they have, it was before I was born) but I can imagine how scary it is to wait, not knowing if he will pull through. My thoughts go to you and fosteronfilm.

  8. elvesforeyes says:

    My thoughts are with you and your husband.

  9. keesa_renee says:

    Oh, Eugie! :hugs: I’ll be praying for him, and for you! :hugs again: I’m so sorry.

  10. nmsunbear says:

    That’s awful. I’m sorry.

  11. ellyssian says:

    Good thoughts heading his way – being breathing impaired myself, I sympathize with him and hope for the best.

    Good thoughts to you as well – having just gone through a fatal illness with my own father not two months ago, I can reiterate the “hope for the best” for you as well and add that, at the same time, plan for the worst. As my dad said, “Hey, I might even live through this!”

  12. I’m sorry, Eugie. We’re going through a similar thing, so I sympathize. Drop me an e-mail if you feel like venting.

  13. mrissa says:

    We are at a spot right now where the phone ringing could mean a new niece/nephew, or it could mean a death in the family. Or, y’know, it could mean someone trying to sell us siding. The uncertainty is a bit tense.

    I hope things go as well as possible for your family.

  14. albionidaho says:

    I’m so sorry.

    You and your family have my best thoughts.

  15. *hugs* I can totally relate to what you’re going through, as my dad has had a lot of health problems recently and whenever my mom calls, I immediately look at the time and if she’s calling at a time when she’d normally be at work I start to panic. All I can say is: At least you and have each other and you can help each other hold it together. Sometimes you’ll be the stronger one and you’ll be comforting him, and sometimes vice versa. *hugs*

    • Eugie Foster says:

      Thank you. Yeah, if the phone rings late in the evening or at night, especially, I get a sick feeling in my stomach. You have my good wishes and thoughts for your dad.

  16. gannet says:

    I’m so sorry to see this. I don’t quite know what to say, but I’ll be thinking of you and your family and hoping for the best.

  17. markdeniz says:

    Fingers crossed and big hugs over the pond.

  18. palmerwriter says:

    I’m so sorry, Eugie. I know how you feel. I got a small taste of it last week when my mother was in the hospital. She’s fine now, but watching her go through two emergency surgeries in two days was unsettling to say the least. My father died when I was fourteen, so I’ve already lost one parent. Whatever happens, just know that your friends are here for you, whether in the flesh or virtually. And writing helps.

  19. I’m sorry.

    It is scary to go through, and it sucks mightily. And the simultaneously crappy, amazing, and wonderful thing about life is that we always come out of these things on the other end. I won’t say “better” or “stronger” or “unchanged,” but we do come out.

    My thoughts are with you. I’ll keep my fingers crossed for the best.

  20. basletum says:

    I know how you feel. I’ve been going through similar stuff with my mom. She’s been in the hospital three times in the past month. I hope he recovers. But if (and considering how tough he seems from what I’ve read in you LJ; that’s a pretty big “if”) he doesn’t, take comfort in knowing that his spirit has gone to a much better realm.

  21. gillpolack says:

    I am sending supportive and calming thoughts your way. No easy path through this one, but maybe it will help to know we are thinking of you.

  22. Go to Illinois sooner than later, if at all possible. I’ll be thinking of you all.

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