They don’t make soda cans like they used to

Had a little excitement yesterday before dinner. Matthew was putting cans of Mountain Dew into the ‘fridge when he dropped one. The can ruptured and began spewing fizzy liquid all over the kitchen, up the cabinet walls, and over everyone. Think one of those fireworks that spin around throwing sparks in a flashy spiral, except Mountain Dew instead of sparks.

Matthew was bent over going “ow!” (I thought he’d dropped the can on his foot, but as it turns out, the first spray had shot him in the eye.) Hobkin was watching the show, only a few steps away from ground zero. And the wounded can was still hissing and spitting its insides in a wide spray. I grabbed up the nearly-empty can and deposited it in the sink, plucked up the Dew-covered skunk and deposited him in his area, and then took stock.

Husband red-eyed and blinking, but fortunately none the worse from being shot in the face with high-pressure citrus soda. Kitchen covered in sticky liquid. Husband covered in sticky liquid. Self covered in sticky liquid. Skunk covered in sticky liquid, wanting to get to the sticky liquid puddles lying on the floor. Dinner continuing to cook on the stove.


Matthew and I took turns cleaning the kitchen and showering off the Dew. Tried to dry off Hobkin with paper towels, salient word being try. We all had our abbreviated dinner. Then it was skunk bath-time resulting in no-longer-sticky but most definitely miffed and damp skunk for several hours.

The funny thing is, Hobkin was right next to Matthew when the can fell and exploded. Normally, I would have expected him to startle and puff his tail up, maybe run for cover, but he took it all in stride. It’s weird what will set off the little fuzzhead and what won’t.

So we’re mostly recovered from our mishap. But the kitchen floor is still sticky.

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12 Responses to They don’t make soda cans like they used to

  1. soyfaerie says:

    I remember the glass bottle sodas….they need to bring those back!!

    I was gonna say, I’m glad that Hobkin was within safe distance from the explosion haha.

    I bet that it’s STICKY! I hope you don’t have carpet!

    • Eugie Foster says:

      If it had been glass it probably would have broken, which wouldn’t have been an improvement. But if it’d been the old style soda cans that are a bit thicker than the thin ones of today, it probably wouldn’t have ruptured.

      I hope you don’t have carpet!

      The incident happened in the kitchen, which is hardwood, but some of the spray made it into the foyer and the dining room, which is carpeted. Sigh. At least it was Mountain Dew and not cola!

  2. A) That’s why I don’t drink soda anymore. Too dangerous. 😉

    B) Okay. I gotta know. What does wet skunk smell like, anyway?

    • Eugie Foster says:

      What does wet skunk smell like, anyway?

      Depends what the wetting agent is. Before his bath, Hobkin smelled like Mountain Dew. After, Baby Shampoo.

      When left to his own devices, he’s inclined to smell like bell peppers, celery, and dryer sheets. Occasionally, he gets an “old sock” smell, which usually indicates its time to change his blankets and/or give him a bath.

  3. skeletal504 says:


    every post you make regarding hobkin makes me smile. i love animals… especially the insane, fuzzy kind. 😉 … do you need a special permit or anything to own a skunk? it seems to be a rather uncommon pet. was it difficult to raise him?

    i don’t want children, per se… just a lot of warm fuzzies to keep me entertained and give me something to love. 😉

    • Eugie Foster says:

      Re: skunks…

      Yah, we’re absolutely childfree, but I need a four-legged fuzzy animal in the home or I’m just not happy. I assume it’s maternal instinct gone awry ’cause I definitely get a sense of peace when I’m holding Hobkin.

      do you need a special permit or anything to own a skunk?

      Depends where you are. It’s illegal to own skunks in many states. Some states require a permit. And in some states they’re legal without a permit. Georgia is legal without a permit, barring black and whites. Black and white skunks aren’t legal to have as pets here no matter what, but that’s not a hardship for us since Hobkin is a chocolate chip.

  4. astralfire says:

    Have you ever thought about collecting all you Skunk stories and writing them up in a book? Or retell the stories from the skunks oint of view?

    • Eugie Foster says:

      Hobkin’s definitely done time as my muse. I’ve written several stories inspired by our experiences with him, although I’ve never done one just from his point of view. I might yet.

  5. rigel_kent says:

    Almost same thing happened to me a few days ago. I as trying to get some pepsis out of their ring tab, and one exploded ope, getting me in the face (not much any where else tho). But my eyes stung for about 15 minutes after. And this is the stuff we put into our bodies? MMM cold caffiene…..

  6. quasiskunk says:

    At least he didn’t try and drink up all the Dew, or he woulda had another night-time rumbling thru your house! 🙂

    • Eugie Foster says:

      I was surprised he didn’t make more of an effort to lap it up, although he was interested in walking in it. That’s all we need, Hobkin hyped up on sugar and caffeine!

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