Had a lovely afternoon with dire_epiphany, astralfire, and their son at the Atlanta Opera yesterday. Tosca is quite a violent and action-packed opera: jealousy, torture, threatened rape, murder, and suicide. Although I have to admit, plebeian that it makes me, I liked having the subtitles. It made it more accessible for those of us who don’t speak Italian and who aren’t sophisticated opera buffs.
Got home and fosteronfilm received a call from his mom. She and his brother took his dad to the hospital; seems he wasn’t doing well–couldn’t breathe, had no energy, and no appetite. His GP (a doctor I’ve been underwhelmed with from what I’ve heard about him) told Matthew’s mom that this was it; there was nothing else they could do and not to expect him to pull through this time. But one of his specialists–I’m not sure which one, lung or heart–seemed to think there was more to try. They put in a stint and a temporary (?) pacemaker, but my dad-in-law stopped being responsive while Mom-in-law was there. She had to go home, and after she left, he had some sort of crash that resulted in them putting him on a respirator. Dad-in-law has a living will that stipulates that he doesn’t want to be left on a respirator, but it sounds like he doesn’t have a DNR. Seems the hospital tried to contact Mom-in-law when he crashed to ask her what they should do, and when they couldn’t reach her, they went ahead and put him on it.
All-in-all, the situation is exceedingly grim. fosteronfilm and I will be going up there probably either later today or tomorrow. We’re both expecting this to be our farewell to his dad.
I’m a little more stoic than I thought I’d be right now. I haven’t had a melt down like I did in March. I’d like to think it means that I’ll be able to be the strength and support Matthew and his family will need at this time, but I suspect it’s more likely that I’ll just break down when I see my dad-in-law, as my track record on that front has been resoundingly unstalwart.
My dearest wish would be to never have to say goodbye to someone I love.