Went back to work today. Still feeling rather fragile. I think going cold turkey on both the caffeine and the Clonazepam at the same time was probably a questionable executive decision on my part. Perhaps ironically, it’s the caffeine’s absence that I’m feeling most acutely. I got a lot of clarity back when I went off the Clonazepam. Lost it when I went off the java. But I assume that’s temporary and will lift when the withdrawal headache/fatigue does. My head feels like it’s been mushed over by a steamroller.
I don’t plan for this abstemious phase to be permanent. I still want to take the Clonazepam since I tolerate it reasonably well and it works on my TOS. And I like caffeine too much to just give up. But I’m tired of being dependant on either. So I’m giving them up for a couple weeks to reset my tolerance levels. Again, probably not the smartest thing I’ve ever done to quit both at the same time.
Ouch.
Did a couple more passes on the Horror story. Matthew’s reluctant to first-reader it because I told him what my inspiration was. He’ll still do it, but I’m going to have to poke and prod him to it.
It’s interesting; his squick factor is so much lower than mine when it comes to reading gore and blood, but it’s so much higher when it comes to watching it on the big screen. Or even the not-so-big screen. He refers to “Wintergod,” the story I sold to The Quiet Ward as the “yicky one.” Got another story he responds to that way that’s currently short-listed at an anthology I subbed it to. Apparently, gore appeals to some editors.
On one level I’m pleased to have been able to affect his emotions with my writing. After all, I think the hallmark of really excellent writing is something that gets the reader emotionally involved. On another level I’m dismayed that he’s so yucked-out by something I created. I’m the first to admit that these stories are graphic and blood-smeared, but I tend to think of Matthew as having a stronger stomach than me. After all, he can watch people being flayed alive (i.e. Hellraiser I, II, etc.) without flinching, while I go scampering out of the room with my hands over my ears, eyes averted. It took me three full viewings of Sixth Sense before I’d seen the whole thing through without shutting my eyes through parts of it. I am that much of a wimp.
So I guess I’m left with the question: Is writing fiction with content in it that makes grown men recoil a good thing?
Maybe I should write something fluffy next. With cute, fuzzy animals.
So I guess I’m left with the question: Is writing fiction with content in it that makes grown men recoil a good thing?
heck yeah!
Maybe I should write something fluffy next. With cute, fuzzy animals.
as long as it’s not stuff that furries would like. if you start writing that stuff you’ll have sunk to a level from which there is no recovery 🙂
No furries, huh? So I guess I should hide my bunny ears away . . .
I doubt you’re anywhere near as scary as some people I’ve met with regards to that…
Cute, fuzzy animals…
…being flayed alive!
Bwahahahahahaha!
I was thinking more along the lines of the cute, fuzzy animals doing the flaying, but I’m flexible.
Ack! Cold turkey on caffiene?? That about killed me the first time I tried to do that, I had the worst withdrawal headaches you can imagine. I think it was an iffy executive decision at best… maybe you could try just cutting back until you are off it, if you are trying for any kind of long term exodus of the stuff. Of course, I am a caffiene junkie, so I don’t know why I would encourage you to stop. 🙂
Something fluffy? As long as it’s girls in bunny ears, or kitty ears, I say, go for it! *cough* Of course, um… that was just my own personal opinion. 🙂
I’m still dealing with the withdrawal headaches. Ouch. They’re getting better, though. Except I still feel like I’m thinking through a fog of jell-o. I’ve been tempted a couple times to ease off the caffeine and have a half decaf/half regular cup of java to see me through rather than doing it cold turkey, but in my experience, I quit something better if I just stop and get all the unpleasantness over quickly, rather than suffering a little bit for a long time. I quit smoking cold turkey. It was much easier than cutting down gradually, which I also tried. Of course, I don’t plan to stay off caffeine, so perhaps I’m in with the oranges v. apples here . . .
“Something fluffy? As long as it’s girls in bunny ears, or kitty ears, I say, go for it! *cough* Of course, um… that was just my own personal opinion.“
Girls in bunny ears good, check. 🙂
So I guess I’m left with the question: Is writing fiction with content in it that makes grown men recoil a good thing?
Yes. Very good. Remind us closer to the release date so us poor folk can look for it in the stores. 😉
Maybe I should write something fluffy next. With cute, fuzzy animals.
Like Cujo? He was fluffy and fuzzy… and rabid, but he didn’t hurt anyone… much.
No fear. I’ll all for tooting my own horn. Loudly.
“Like Cujo? He was fluffy and fuzzy… and rabid, but he didn’t hurt anyone… much.“
I’m seeing a theme here. Cute, fluffy, and vicious.
Like Bunnicula!
I’m with you: I think a visceral reaction to fiction is a good thing. At the same time, I’ve always been the most impressed by works that achieve squick in a minimalistic fashion. In the most shocking scene I’ve ever seen is a movie, the villain creeped up a stairway and jabbed a pencil through the back of somebody’s ancle, behind the Achilles Tendon. Still makes me shudder. On the other hand, I’m very blase over buckets of blood and guts. That scene was just about the *only* one I’ve ever seen in a horror movie that particularly creeped me out – I yawned through the first couple Hellraisers, and didn’t bother with the later ones. I’m the same way with books; I don’t bother reading very much horror, because I don’t have much reaction to it. Probably the creepiest book I’ve read was “Into the Out Of”, by (I think) Alan Dean Foster. The ending was stupid, but the first half of the book was satisfyingly spooky.
I think Matthew’s in the same camp as you when it comes to movies. Not much really creeps him out. There’s an old black and white movie called The Uninvited (I think) which he still lauds as one of the scariest ghost story movies ever made. It’s definitely pretty creepy, but definitely understated (to whit, I’ve been able to watch it). Nothing blatant or up-front, nothing even jumping out at you suddenly (which I really hate), but a definitely chilling film.